Titney Spheres
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This may be a very rare example of a porn parody which is actually *better* than the thing it parodies. Britney Spears, is, basically, someone who has very little musical talent, but who exploits the fact that we’d all like to shag her to make her living. (Actually, that sounds like about 98% of all porn stars to me…)
Anyway, this film has been around for a while in a different, softcore made-for-TV edition, but the full, no-holes barred hardcore version is now, thankfully, available here.
What makes this filmwork so well is that they’ve carefully studied all the things that make Britney sexy - the grown up school uniform, the dancing, the cute, yet innocent look - and re-purposed it for porn. And so we have the story of the very familar-seeming pop starlet Titney Spheres (Michelle Thorne), who sets out to make it to the top of the music industry by talent alone.
Well, she has many talents, not all of them musical, so technically she does do that. We see her using her ample skills on managers, producers, DJs, VJs, random girls in limos… really she’s quite a talented girl, although maybe not so much on the musical side. She even gets married to a sleazy guy in the last scene. Almost completely paralleling the life of Ms. Spears, but with none of the manufactured tease.
Overall, this is a great movie, although it perhaps relies a little too much on girl/girl. Depending on your preference, though, this may be a good or bad thing – the girl/girl scenes really are top notch, and contain plenty of set up dialogue – she’s not just licking that muff for fun you know. Oh no, she’s only doing it because it’s important to her career, to make sure she gets her record played on the radio, or NTV, or even to secure the services of a publishing company. Innocent little Titney quickly rises to the occasion, and makes a very good little pussy slut.
Of course, it’s not all girl on girl – the first and last scenes are full-on boy/girl scenes where Titney gets it in the ass, pussy and mouth, just as we expect of all our upstanding porn stars – as she doesn’t disappoint.
In the end, Michelle Thorne’s portrayal comes across as two parts Britney, one part Jordan, especially with her bit tits and slightly surprised facial expression – but this is by no means a bad thing. Apparently, she also wrote and directed the whole thing, so this really is Michelle’s movie. It’s also nice to see a UK studio turning out such quality product. And you’ve got to love the busty Michelle Thorne – she was even on the X-Factor a while back.
Fans of pop music will love this, if you’re fed up with the music industry marketing sex but always failing to deliver the goods - this movie does exactly what you expect. We get to see Miss Spheres getting it in the ass, pussy and mouth, as well as a lot of very hot girl on girl action. For a change, this is one very satisfied music fan.
