Pornomedics
Pornomedics is a collection
of hardcore scenes from the
well known soft series on the
UK adult channels… and with
the higher budget production
and a cast of uniformly stunning
established stars and a clear
theme, it really can’t go wrong.
Lynsey Jones and her boyfriend
are shagging in their car, when
oh no! - she grabs the superglue
instead of the lube! Ah well, it
happens to us all, and luckily an
ambulance arrives within seconds
despite not being told a location by the flustered stud.
Fortunately, they just happen to have a liquid handy
to unstick the superglue, and despite all the unarousing
talk of how much it stings, the female paramedic
(Louise Ventura) and her male colleague are beginning
to touch themselves up just below the level of the car
window, unable to resist the sight of the newly freed
naked couple in the car. Still in full gloves and uniform,
Louise crouches to suck his cock, before a beautiful
copulation in various positions on the ambulance
bonnet, made deliciously naughty by him staying
fully overalled throughout, with his cock poking
through the fly. The next poor little injured petal
is Summer Louise, who has hurt her shoulder
lifting weights in the gym. As paramedic Sarah
Micheals cheekily strokes her lycra clad crotch
‘to relax her’, the male paramedic goes in for an
entirely unsolicited snog. Of course, Summer’s
personal trainer then has a pressing problem in
his trousers, which Sarah kindly deals with orally
as she elegantly continues to finger and lick
Summer’s shaved pussy. The action is really nicely
cast, with Sarah’s tiny body looking ravishing as
she slips off her baggy green suit, and Summer’s
tight and toned frame erotically draped over various
fitness machines for some prime dicking. Cathy Barry
and Michelle Thorne are the big names in the next all
girl scene, which takes place in an authentic looking
hospital ward. Cathy is mindblowingly sexy as a nurse,
with her enormous jugs coming out very quickly to
take the patient’s mind off her sore back. You’ll love
the very professional nurse-like way Cathy comments
on the Michelle’s shaven pussy too - very erotic acting
there. It’s incredible to see these top babes in such
explicit group action with Sarah Daykin, Lisa Michaels
and Louise Hodges - 5 very pretty women on the same
bed means you won’t know where to look, as the
gasping, writhing heap exchange tender kisses, deep
tongue in pussy action, and plenty of skilful dildoing.
The next injury is more promising - a factory machine
has trapped Jane Whitehouse’s hand, although she
stays calm as the paramedics easily pull her free.
Hilariously, one of the nurses goes a bit over the
top and gasps, “There’s blood everywhere” -
disappointingly but unsurprisingly, there’s actually
not a drop… it’s just a sprain. Obviously the
ambulance crew need to get her naked (in hospital)
for a sprained wrist, but as nurses Stephanie and Lisa
Trueman slip out of their tight dresses, Jane has an
unmistakable change of heart and goes from wounded
kitten to rampant sex kitten as she eagerly sucks on
Stephanie’s tits. This scene contains dildos, stockings
and plenty of naughty, slickly directed lesbian action.
More hospital based Cathy Barry sex in the last scene
with Jane Whitehouse again, and Sarah Daykin and
Claire Evans playing supporting nurses. The medical
pretence is kept up even longer this time, as they
sort out a sprained ankle with stocking clad licking,
sucking and bouncy strapon fucking. The squeals of
pleasure that issue from the leggy batch of smooth,
tanned flesh occasionally surrender such erection
stiffening lines as, “Oh, my clit’s all throbbing, it’s
tingling to fuck”.It’s that kind of dirty talk that makes
us understand why some of you wish more modern
UK porn was this, well, innocent. There’s no extreme
penetration, no slapping, no spitting, no anal even.
Just very, very erotic sex from some of the most
beautiful looking models the UK has to offer,
performing in well scripted, healthily horny but
nicely normal scenes.
